Hello, at last! It has been a long time not because I didn’t want to write I just didn’t no what to write or more than that I wasn’t sure how to put it in words. I am starting to think I over think the blog thing way too much. I am not a great writer I wish I was because I feel I have so much I want to write and discuss.
First things first as you can see in earlier posts below I was working out very regularly eating good trying to train for a figure competition. Why you ask? Well truthfully it was because I had friends that did it and I wanted to look like them (which I still do, at some point in life maybe). The more I got into the sport the harder it was for me to be around my family and be “normal” meaning we would eat as a family but I didn’t eat that delicious bowl of spaghetti I had chicken with veggies or something like that. Don’t get me wrong I am not bashing the diet or lifestyle at all. It just wasn’t for me it took 18 months or closer to 2 years to figure it out. I felt very selfish always worrying about me. What am I going to eat today, when am I going to go to the gym, what am I going to pack to eat when we travel, it always seemed like I was thinking me, me, me. I do still follow people in the sport who are motivating but not to crazy in it. There were others things too that turned me away but that is the gist of it. I guess it all boiled down to I just didn’t need that in my life and it was something I was putting there myself that I could easily remove. So, I did and I felt like a complete failure for not doing what I set out to do because it feels that is all I do is start things without ever finishing. One characteristic I wish to change.
While I was deciding if competing is for me I thought about “Why am I here?” “What is my purpose on this earth? I think of this so often and have throughout the years. I feel I was made for such big things. I just have never felt that I have “made” it yet. I am not sure when I started to think differently probably at church reading uplifting stories I am not sure but I am “here” to raise my kids to the best of my ability, to be a good wife to my husband, to be a loving daughter of my Father in Heaven, to be a good sister,friend and neighbor, to server others. Yes I already know all these things but never thought of them daily do you? I have just reached a point in life that my kids need a parent that they can look up to. I wasn’t feeling like I was doing a good job with that not just because of the bodybuilding but other things I may get into later.
I started to think about exersice and staying fit in a different way. It is a blessing to be able to exercise there are so many that aren’t able to. I want to treat my body as a blessing if that makes any sense at all? I still put good things into it and exercise the way I want to (weightlifting is still my favorite way to exercise) making my body stronger makes me feel like I am keeping my blessing in shape.
There are so many other things I am “working” on in my life right now besides making my body stronger which really is at the bottom at the moment. My focus lately has been on researching the minimalist lifestyle. I am so sick of “stuff”. I used to love to shop when I was younger my aunt would take me shopping but of course she was spending her money lovingly on me. Now I dread it. Grocery shopping is the worst! but necessary. I’m just not into spending money on junk especially. I hate happy meals with cheap plastic China made toys, birthday favors again from China I pretty much can’t stand anything out of Oriental Trading. Why do we need all this stuff? Okay rant over 🙂
Back to becoming a minimalist all I will say is this is something that intrigues me very much and my blog is now going to start taking a different direction for now. Who knows what it will be a month from now, my mind is never tired that is for sure. I would like to post minimalist tips, recipes, stories all that stuff. I feel as a society we are overly stimulated with too much “stuff” and this will help me vent about it and possibly help my family and I down a more peaceful route in life….crossing my fingers.
I just found this on my favorite page http://www.prayfit.com if you don’t follow it you should. I seen it right after I posted to my blog. Now if that isn’t divine intervention I don’t no what is!